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Saturday, September 27, 2008

-->september is ending. october is coming <--

but the end of this month does not seem good.
okie the month has not end yet. so i hope things will turn for the better.

hmmz. how i wish i can talk abt how i feel abt my 1 yr 8 mths now...but wait.
let it put to an end first. besides, i still have some more days to go.

this few days has been not veri good for me.
no outings. okie that is nth to complain abt.
i tried to start running more. actually probably not a lot compared to many. after that day, i actually sprained by ankle. and it seemed to getting worse everyday. but i still walked rather naturally. of coz...only 1 friend managed to realize.

i lost my beads. my beads that my aunty bought for me since the day i stepped into the army and i have no idea where it was placed at. and i am actually quite sad. because it has given me a lot of hopes. probably because i take it as part of myself already. so when i see there is nothing on my wrist, i actually feel very weird.

one of my tutees vent his stress on me. he said that tuition is probably a waste of time. and that what i taught him seemed not applying. and that i became the cause why he did so badly for his class test. because i told him the wrong thing. and afterwhich, he just looked the other way. said quite hurting remarks (at least for that moment i thought it was)...i wanted to just walk out because i was already very disappointed. because i actually walked with a limp for so far to his house, because i have always telling him what to do but he has never really paid attention to what i say...but i did not leave. that is because i know i am responsible partly for his results since i started tutoring him, that i am responsible to his parents. so i just carried on. but i told him he can always choose to terminate. and in fact, i am quite tired of tuition. all i can do now is to push his results so that at least he do much better for his final year.

when i was walking back home, all this just came to my mind.
keep running...just for 1 moment, i felt a bit helpless.
but i know very well that all i can do is work harder.

what else?

oh, please don't tell me that i look very free okie.
i admit that my job scope is so much more less tedious, but if travelling here and there everyday and having to........ok. stop me. i should not complain. i know that very well.


on a lighter tone...

i got my S.H.E CD! finally! i like some of the songs though. 7/10.
i still did meet some of my clique ppl this saturday.
i am making new christmas stuffs (ok, i know it is a bit early...but it makes me happy.)
i am resting at home on saturday...(Finally after few hrs of sleep everidae)
i finished watching Moonlight Renonsiance. (don't know spelling correct not).


"你应该很遥远,住在不知名的星球,平凡的我只能远远看着。这样,最好。我想,是吧。"


smile always
take care
(xing) 08

Sweet-ed <3
6:05 AM


Sunday, September 14, 2008

september.
it has been raining for the past few days.
the sun has been cruel for the past few days too.
such a weather, unpredictable.

just like how a person behaves.
isnt't it? lolz.

this week practically did nothing much.
saturday was quite a quick day. tuition followed by grandma house.
brought my cousin to swensens for ice-cream.
and guess what?
someone thought i was a FATHER. i am shocked. hahaz.
well, it is good to be such a young father after all. haha.

everything is still fine. just feel low at times. but i guess that is just part of what is within me.
cannot be helped. foresee that i need to work really soon. and i am hoping for work too. not only because of money, maybe because it can keep me busy. i don't want to feel lost after 22 months. afterall. 20th month...okie. i should not talk abt it. all leave it to a conclusion and the 22nd month. i guess i wil have 10 pages to blog about. but probably not. again.

i am glad still.
because whenever i see rebel. i am still very happy.
i don't know why. but just very glad. don't know how to xplain.
hahaz. similiarly, i am very glad to see all my family members. though i am not a good member of the family. hahaz.

life still moves on.

我买了《今天情人节》的专辑。
仔细聆听,由梁静茹重新演绎的《诱惑的街》真的很不错。
很有层次感。可以的话,要去听一下。

发觉怎么自己越来越大,
了解事情的能力越来越差。
有时候自己已经不知道可以再相信谁。
我每天都抱着很紧绷的心理。直到回家时,
才能脱掉伪装。
我不明白。为什么明明一些对我们很好的人,
却会无端端地被别人践踏。
真的很不应该。
我呢,却什么也做不了。
像个哑巴,还是明哲保身的方式?
所以,我只期盼这样的日子可以赶快结束。
我不希望到最后自己会随波逐流。
我希望还是自己。
可以分辨什么是好的,什么是坏的。
什么人才是真正关心我的。
什么人总是自以为了不起的。

这个打工的世界(或许只是在这样的制度里
才会有这样的事情吧。
即使现在被人看见了,
我还是要说
做人啊。总得该公平一点。
起码要给予别人最基本的尊重。

smile always
take care
(xing) 08

Sweet-ed <3
3:11 AM


Saturday, September 06, 2008

--> we sent mw off to changi airport today for his outfield exercise @ Thailand and he wil be back in 3 weeks! = ) guess that will be very fast! it will be just nice that S.H.E album arrives! also celebrated my jc friend's birthday todae. lolz~~

-->机场。
是一个很有意义的地方。
人来人往。
最快乐,最难过可以在一霎那之间发生。
不一样的人走在同样的地方。
上机,下机,转机。
每一天在机场都上演着不一样的故事。
这是个很奇妙的地方。

看着每一个班机飞往不同的城市,
我也有想离开的感觉。
是一种逃避,不切实际的想法吗?
但是就是希望自己可以是其中一位乘客。

东京,巴黎,希腊,台湾,韩国,日本,米兰,墨尔本。。。

让我飞翔吧。。。

smile always
take care
(xing) 08

Sweet-ed <3
9:37 AM